My daughter was turning six. I was turning the county upside-down, looking for a non-gouging venue for a party. I just can't pay $200 or more for a kid's birthday party, even if they do include the cake, even if they do the cleanup, and even if Gracie is the best girl in the world. (She is.)

So my choices became the McPlayground with the brain hemorrhage-inducing echo coupled with screaming birthday monkeys or the hot, hot park plus melted cake, melted ice cream and melted mommies or I thought about a swimming party at Mills Park, since it's not that crazy expensive, and can be fun for parents too. But then I remembered I would not only have to wear a swim suit, but also shave my legs. Do you have any idea how much work would go into those two things alone? I'd hate to have to explain to my baby girl that, although her birthday is mid-August, her party would be well after Labor Day, because it will take that long for mommy to get results from her liquid diet.

Sidenote: have you ever tried sewing the control top from your hose into your one-piece swim suit? Nobody will believe you're that thin, but at least your belly won't look like the top of an apple without its stem.

So where do I go for ideas? I could go to Google, and I frequently do. But somehow it doesn't seem that a search engine based in northern California is going to give me the live and local 4-1-1 on cheap party options.

I, being a naturally resourceful person, created a social network over two years ago, and themed it to be specific to the area where I faithfully reside, so that when this day came, I'd be able to pose this burning question to a well-targeted panel of hundreds of other local residents smart enough to join up with indeed such a naturally resourceful person like me.

I did pose that question a couple of days ago on MySaline.com, and got a good response. One idea suggested was to check with local banks, hotels and restaurants to inquire about their conference rooms. Nice. But there was more. Another suggestion was a picnic next to Riverside Grocery and a swim in Saline River. Even better.
One offered a fun theme for girls and even went into detail.

"OK Shelli... Except for the venue, why not do a tea party? My sis did it for [her daughter's] 6th bday. Have Daddy dress in suit or tux and serve the little ladies. Buy straw hats and silk flowers for the girls to decorate, or get those plain paint-em-yourself teapots. That's your decor and your activity. Bake cupcakes, and the girls get to decorate those too. Take it from there... get creative. [My niece] loved it... you may hate the idea, but it can be a lot of fun, especially if the girls are girly girls and want to wear party dresses!"

I didn't hate the idea, but the boys who were invited might not be keen on it. The whole "boys are stinky" thing Gracie's dad and I tried to teach her hasn't caught on quite yet.

Some other ideas were to go to the skating rink or see if a country club accepted guests for swimming. I was delighted at how many choices popped up. Okay, not as many as Google would have given me, but the choices were relevant and recommended by someone who knew what they were talking about - not by a west coast cyberbot. Not that there's anything wrong with being a cyberbot. I once had one as a roommate in '91.

Back to the task at hand and a day later...

My husband and I had gotten the gifts but didn't have a tick of time for planning this shindig. I'll save it for some other column, but we have a great gob of goings-on just right now. I devised a plan.

It consisted of picking up my precious daughter from her beloved grandparents' house and situating myself between their television and recliners, then asking, "Do you happen to know of anyone who might be willing to host a little girl's sixth birthday party at their house on Saturday? I mean, I'm just asking. If you might. Know someone."

Man, they really love their granddaughter. And likely me too. I'm pretty lucky to have my parents nearby and willing. I reported back to MySaline.com to let folks know of my decision of where to celebrate.

"A nice lady said we could have it her house - Gracie's Gramma! Party in Bryant, y'all!"

I was careful not to give the address, or she might end up with a few more party orders to answer.

So there it is. Got a question? Lay it on MySaline.com. The members may not always have the idea you'll use right now, since you have so many lame excuses for not being creative and outstanding and overwhelmingly doting, but you'll get answers.


This column by Shelli Russell published in the Benton Courier on August 16, 2009.
See more of Shelli's columns here.